Falling
by CoriRedde
Summary: I can define my life in three moments: the day my mother died, the day I met Rukia Kuchiki, and the moment I realized I was in love with Rukia Kuchiki. When she was taken from me, I had two options. I could save her and regret losing everything else, or I could let her die and regret not saving her; either way, I'm screwed. Well, fuck. AU. Sex. Language.


**Welcome to my first attempt at a first-person story...and I'm doing a guy's pov. Well, fuck. Wish me luck, review, and enjoy!**

**WARNING: Heavy language ahead. Somebody needs to use soap on Ichigo's brain...**

**WARNING II: I've upped the ages in this one. Ichigo is 18/19 ish which makes his sisters 14/15ish and all of Soul Society about the same because no one understands the aging of Shinigami...**

Falling

A Bleach FanFiction

CoriRedde

_**Summary:**__ I can define my life in three moments: the day my mother died, the day I met Rukia Kuchiki, and the moment I realized I was in love with Rukia Kuchiki. When she was taken from me, I had two options. I could save her and regret losing everything else, or I could let her die and regret not saving her; either way, I live with regret for the rest of my life. Well, fuck. AU._

* * *

**_I. First Song, When the Stars Fall_**

The sky looks weird today. I don't know why, nor do I give a damn, but I notice anyway. That's the problem with being me, Ichigo Kurosaki. I can see things, which is a real pain in the ass, by the way, that no one else can see. Well, that's a slight understatement. My younger sister Karin can see this shit too, but she lives in denial, so I don't count her. Her twin, my other sister, Yuzu, can't see jack shit, but she can sense it. Out of the three of us, I'm pretty sure I'm the only unfortunate asshole who actually attracts the attention of these weird _things. _Did I mention I have no idea what the fuck the stuff is? Anyway, I figure as long as no shrinks or retards like that hear I'm seeing stuff that _doesn't exist_ I'm fine.

Glass breaks somewhere across the street. Damn, I'm not in the mood; however, moral obligation and shit such as forces me to turn at the crosswalk and look at the damage. I wonder if scowling could cause scars or something later in life?

"-shit, man, like hell if I know!" One of those fuckers laughs, kicking a piece of a broken glass around. I'm not stupid, I know what that means. Yet another offering for a car accident victim is being messed with. "Probably threw up on her when he realized what he did!"

"Yeah," another one agrees, pulling at the petals on one of the flowers, "That'd be fuckin' hilarious-"

"Pretty hilarious, yeah," I interject into their conversation when I'm close. I lean casually against the light post. "Like how your faces are gonna look in a minute." I have to choke back a laugh when those guys jump out of their skin. Jokers. They all stand, holding their bodies in a forward hunch as if ready to fight. Well, that I can provide.

"Who the hell are you, kid?" One of them, I assume him to be a boss of sorts, demands. He's arrogant, cigarette sticking out of his mouth.

"Name's not really important." I shrug. I watch the leader raise an eyebrow at me. What? Does he expect a fuckin' resume or something? I point at the broken glass and scattered flowers. "What is important is _that."_ Damn, they are some real morons. They look around, confused.

"What the fuck you talkin' 'bout, brat?" Brat? He's blind too, apparently. There's no way this guy is older than me by more than two years. "There ain't nothin' there!"

I snort impatiently, "Yeah?" Before the idiot can blink I've got my foot planted on his back, my hand gripping his hair and shoving his face into the broken glass. "What do you call this?" I gesture to the broken memorial using that guy's head. His cronies gulp. I'm laughing inside.

"It's- uh..." I tug a little harder on his hair. I'm going to have to wash my hands after this. This guy reeks.

"What was that?" I ask just a little too sweetly. An instant later those fuckers are all bowing low in front of me, pressing their foreheads to the ground.

"We're sorry!" They're crying pathetically. Honestly, I'll just start by yanking some idiot's hair out next time. These results are...sadistically, very nice. I pull the guy trapped under my foot up a little and glare hard at him.

"If I see you doing some shit like this again, I won't let you off so easy." I shake him. "Got it?" The greasy man trembles, shaking his head vigourously. I nod in satisfaction and kick him into his group of cronies. They all trip over themselves down the sidewalk to wherever the hell they're going. I chuckle a little to myself.

Then I feel it. That rush of energy that pricks the base of my skull. I turn and there she is, the little girl for whom the offering had been for.

"Thank you, Mister," she says sweetly. She bows. I watch her look at her flowers with this dark, hurt expression. Tears of astral liquid seep down her cheeks.

"Hey, it's no problem," I shrug, tossing a weak smile on my face and forcing my eyebrows apart. "I'll bring you some new flowers tomorrow, okay?" She smiles then, a genuine one that has her eyes closed from the force of it. She looks exactly like my little sister then, I can't help but think her cute. Don't worry, I'm not a pedophile. Besides, she's _dead._

"Thank you, Mister!" She waves at me, her form fading slowly. I glance at her over my shoulder.

"Name's Ichigo," I tell her. She giggles. Cute kid, really. I look back up at the sky as I continue my journey home. It really does look weird, like it's ripping apart or something. Like it's bleeding blue instead being blue. Gah, that doesn't make any damn sense.

Home is a clinic. My old man's a doctor; he's got me and my twin sisters trained in the ways of nursing. From the outside, I guess it's a pleasing looking place, happy, yellow siding always looking out of place from the darker colors of the other houses on our street. I walk up to the think and tug my key from my pocket. After unlocking the door (which we really need to get fixed from how many times my dad's dented it from falling down the steps), I take a deep breath before shoving the thing open and getting my ass inside as quick as possible.

And there it is.

I grab my old man's ankles and sling him into the wall, shoving my hands in my pockets.

"I'm home," I call. I sound pissed. I think my family knows to read that as annoyed.

"Ichigo, my boy!" My dad cries, falling on his knees to hug my legs. God, what a five-year-old. Scratch that, I'll give him two. "There is nothing more I can teach you!" How many times have I heard that? Just about every day after every failed attack counts up to...ick, mental math.

"Get up, goat-chin," a new voice to the circus of my house intrudes. A leg kicks away the nuisance snuggling with my leg. A new wail of pain sounds from his direction. The newcomer and I share slightly pleased smirks.

"Hey, Ichi," my younger sister greets me. Her dark hair is sticking to her neck and her clothes reek of grass and sweat.

"Yo, Karin," I respond, bumping my fist with her. The kid is too cool for her own good, seriously. "Kickin' ass on the field today?" She's fourteen, a varsity Soccer player in her first year of high school. To top that, she's the best player the team's seen since...well, me.

"You know I did!" She defends, crossing her arms. "You don't seem roughed up. Not in the mood, Ichigo?" I scoff, copying her crossed arms position.

"Please, kid, those fuckers didn't even bother to fight back." She laughs, an evil little glint in her dark gray eyes.

"Ichigo!" That's Yuzu, the softest, sweetest, little sister anyone could ever have. She and Karin are, quite literally, day and night. Where Karin is dark-haired, and dark-eyed, with a rough demeanor and tomboy ways, Yuzu is bright-haired with wide-eyes and an overall sweetheart with a naive side to her caring. However, both of them are tough nuts to crack, and I'm proud to call them my sisters.

"Yuzu," I say, my voice a little softer. Sure, I know in my head she can take anything I may dish at her, but she has this aura (I'm the weird one who can see that stuff, remember?) that makes anyone feel calm and at home. I'm pretty sure I have some sort of bad-emotion-emitting steroids in my aura. Whatever. Fuckers wanna go, I'll take 'em, but I digress.

"Ichigo, I made curry for dinner, ok?" I give her a soft expression. It's not quite a smile, but then, I can't remember the last time I really did that.

"Sounds good, Yuzu." She beams, darting back into the kitchen. Karin sends one last disrespecting look at our father and heads into the kitchen behind her twin, fingers laced behind her head. Like I said, she's just too cool to be fourteen.

I step over the prone form of the old man on the floor. "I'm heading up. Call me for dinner."

"Ok!" Yuzu and Karin shout back. I trudge up the stairs, 'accidentally' kicking my shoes off so that they tumble down the steps into my father's head. That man...I don't even have words to describe him. And I have a pretty colorful vocabulary.

The sky is darkening when I reach my room. It's strange. Wasn't it bright just a few moments ago? I flop down onto my bed, turning my head to stare out the window. It takes only a couple of minutes before the sky looks completely black. The clouds hang low and no stars prick holes through the blackness. What type of Edgar Allen Poe am I pretending to be? Holy shit.

Then there's a crash, something that sounds like a concentrated earthquake has struck one of the buildings nearby. I jolt from my laying down position, scrambling to sitting. The world goes quiet again. I listen intently for any sound, screams, or shouts from outside or downstairs. There's nothing. Am I the only one who heard it? If that's the case, Karin must have too...but she will act as if she hasn't. Damn. What's going on? Is it spirit related? My head spins with questions and I feel nauseous.

Then, all of a sudden, a bright light flits by the window. I snap my head around, but it's too late. The light is gone. So is the noise...the strange crashing and roaring ceases to muddle my thoughts, the usual white noise of night time rising back up. I suppose I should breathe easier now, but my heart is beating too fast. I know something is wrong.

I can feel it.

Then there's a disturbance to my left. There, phazing through the wall is that same shade of light. I blink. What the hell? Something just went through my fucking wall! Aren't walls supposed to be solid? I watch the thing enter my room completely, stepping out of the wall as if it were a frickin' door or something. The world's still normal outside, for now, but in here, there's a sort of static, or at least that's the only way I can think to describe this sensation emitting from the light.

Then I notice. The _thing,_ as I named it in my head, is actually a woman. And hot damn is she weird. She's pretty, don't get me wrong, with this ethereal sort of quality to her and dressed all in neat, white robes that billow around her as if there's wind in my room. She emits this cold sensation, frost decorating her eyelashes and ice swirling up her arms like a million bracelets. She's muttering to herself, her fingers tracing through the air like she's searching for something. I have no idea what the fuck she'd be looking for, but I do know I want her the hell out of my room.

"It's not here," I hear. "But I can feel it." That creeped out feeling? Yeah, Miss Breaking-and-Entering, I feel it too, you're the cause. I stand.

"Hey." I say it in a way to get her attention, but she doesn't even acknowledge me. "Oi." I try again. Still no response, but she is muttering a ton of nonsense that I don't understand. I've had enough.

"Listen to me damnit!" I spring foreword, foot extended. I expect her to turn and avoid the attack, but instead she doesn't move. Ice springs up behind her unexpectedly. I crash into it head on, the crystal wall shattering, shards of it flying around me and the intruder. I land, kneeling. The girl turns.

I hereby take back everything I said about her being pretty. She's not pretty. She's fucking gorgeous.

"You can see me?" I blink in shock at her question. Her voice is low and rich, a regal air surrounding her. I can't believe a person like this exists. Then again, I'm fairly certain she's one of these spirits that haunt me. I mean, c'mon, ice from fucking _nowhere? _

"That's pretty apparent," I sneer back, drawing myself up to standing. The false confidence I had put in my voice becomes real when I realize something else about her.

She's short. As. Hell.

She tilts her head back, continuing to manage to stare me _down_ with her aristocratic glare. How is she doing that?

"You should not see me." She states it like it will make it true, but, unfortunately for her, I can still see her.

"Nice try, short-ass, but I can still see you." Then, I watch something amazing happen. Her calm, beautiful face scrunches up in rage and her muscles tense. I said watch, but in reality, I never saw it. Next thing I know I'm flat on my back from this chick's punch.

"H-how dare you!?" She yells. I sit up groggily.

"How dare I what?" I ask, rubbing my jaw. Damn, that hurt.

She steps forward, bright, purple eyes catching me in a hypnotized state. One startlingly long leg slips from the folds of her robes, the silver sandal lacing up all the way to her thigh. I can't believe I didn't start drooling.

"Do not speak in such manner to me again, human boy," she snarls, one dainty finger held out toward me. By her hand, an arrow made of ice levitates on her orders. "Or I shall take your life." Umm...not that I'm scared or anything, but what the hell? What type of shit is this bitch spouting? I think I must really be retarded because the next thing out of my mouth is this.

"Oh yeah? Who died and made you queen?" For a moment, she merely stands there, gazing at me with frigidity. I try to glare back from my place on the floor. It doesn't work.

Then, she's leaning over me, her long robes floating down around us as she straddles my body, one hand on my neck and the other digging into my chest over my heart. Her face is but an inch from mine.

"Do you not think I can?" She asks, her voice sending shivers of I'm-not-sure-what through me. "For someone who can see such as you can, you are rather ignorant of my world." I would have rolled my eyes if she wasn't staring at me like that. It's half-arousing, half-insulting, and all intimidating.

"I shall teach you, foolish boy, so that next time you do not make the mistake of angering someone such as the likes of my kind." She removes herself from laying on top of me. I swear she slid her body over me for fun, managing to rub her chest all down my stomach before rising. She lifts a hand, soft silver light glowing from her and creating a wall of pure, clear ice.

"I am what you humans have titled 'fey'," she explains, her fingers twisting about to draw illustrations to go with her words. "An otherworldly creature with powers of beauty and death. My name is Rukia Kuchiki, I am heiress to the Noble House of Kuchiki and a member of the thirteenth squad of the Royal Guard." I watch the ice in amazement. Not the good kind. For some reason, despite her serious attitude, her drawings look like rabbits.

What. The. Hell.

"Do you understand?"

I snap out of my confused staring to look at her. She seems pleased with herself. I scowl at her.

"Yeah," I say, "Would have made for sense without your shitty drawings, though." She clenches her fist. The ice shatters.

"You bastard." I blink. This...royal, old-fashioned, polite-speech fanatic just...swore? I stand up from the floor finally.

"Why are you here?" I say. Despite her explanation, she had missed that one exceedingly important detail.

"I have come because - shit." She suddenly swings her head from side to side. She leaps to the window and leans out of it, looking for something, I'm assuming.

"I know I felt it here. There was a Monster."

"A monster?" I repeat, an eyebrow raised in incredulity. She nods.

"Yes," she murmurs, slowly retracting her body from hanging half-way out the window. "A Monster. They are the opposite of the souls you have no doubt seen all your life."

"Those spirits of dead people?"

Another nod from her, her midnight hair swishing around her shoulders. "They are the souls of those who have passed from life, but have not made it to death. A limbo, if you prefer. They are harmless, but they attract Monsters like moths to the flame. Every Monster wants to devour them and use the souls as power. With this power, Monsters can invade my homeland. The purpose of the Royal Guard is to defeat Monsters before they may cause us harm. That is the my mission here in the human world." My head hurts. I never knew a person could spew so many elegant words together and say something meaningful at the same time. There's a roar somewhere at the back of my hearing.

"Did you hear that?"

The girl, Rukia, she said her name was, tilts her head to the left. "Are you mocking me?" She asks, a dark energy leaking from her despite the pleasant demeanor she wears. I shake my own head furiously as the roar sounds again, louder this time. Could she be any more sensitive, really?

"Really, fairy-girl, did you hear that?"

She throws up her hands exasperatedly, the ice in my room shattering once again. Briefly, I wonder why Yuzu and Karin or even Dad never came up to ask what all the noise was. Where was the call for dinner?

"Fool, there is nothing here-"

My house shakes. There's a terrified scream and a bewildered shout that sounds eerily familiar.

"Yuzu, Dad!" I shout, alarmed. I shoot to my feet, racing past the girl in my room. She looks scared too, her eyes wide with shock and disbelief. I wrench the door open and prepare to take the stairs in one leap...

Except, at the landing, lays my little sister Karin. Her hair is matted with blood, her T-shirt torn.

"Ichi-igo," she gasps out, her hand reaching for me.

"Karin!" I scream in return. I race to her side, picking her up and cradling her in my arms. "Shit, Karin, what- what happened?" She shakes her head numbly, tears leaking from her eyes.

"I don't know!" She cries, sobs shaking her battered body, "Only I could see it and I don't even know what _it _was!" Karin in hysterics is...frightening. I've never seen her look so scared in my life. That's the moment when it finally clicks in my head. The feeling I've been feeling all day...has entered my house.

I clutch Karin closer to me, standing and running out the door. The sight of Yuzu and my Dad, both unconscious, suspended in midair greets me. Holding them, its face stretched into a maniacal grin by the white mask covering its stinking face. I mean that literally. The thing stank of sulfur and rotting flesh, or at least, what I assume sulfur and rotting flesh to smell like.

I set Karin down, moving away from her before screaming at the thing crushing my other family members. Funny, not too much earlier, the girl was a thing in my head.

"Oi, ass-faced bastard!" The thing pauses, a low chuckle emitting from it in a gust of blood-smelling breath.

I look around me desperately. There's nothing here for me to use as a weapon. I suppose my fists will have to do. I'm already running by the time I reach this conclusion, careening toward the monster and screaming.

"Put them down you mother fucker!" I prepare to leap at it, when out of nowhere (seriously, why does that keep happening today? Stuff should come from a place, damnit!) a ripple of pure white dives through the monster. Its arms cleave clean on from its body, my Dad and sister falling toward the concrete. I barely manage to catch Yuzu in time, her small frame nestled in my hold.

Why is this happening? I don't understand anything.

I stand to race away from the monster to take Yuzu back to where Karin is hiding. I never quite get there.

Some trick of the monster's trips me up, sending me crashing to the ground, Yuzu rolling just out of reach. I'm glad. At least she's safe.

I roll over. There, above me, drooling on me, is that thing. It raises its head to bare its fangs and one extends. The white bone shoots from its gum socket and grows to impale me in the chest. I'm done for.

I want to close my eyes and wait for the inevitable, but I never get a chance. That girl is there, Rukia Kuchiki, her body taking the attack. The fang is pierced through her stomach; her scream shreds the sky. Again, I am not Edgar Allen Poe but this freaky shit brings freaky words to my head.

Ice explodes from the girl's body, sending the monster crashing back, stunning it for a moment. Rukia drops to the ground.

"H-hey!" I scramble to her on hands and knees. I probably look really pathetic, but at the moment I can't bring myself to care enough to dwell on it. "Are you ok?"

"What a stupid question," she answers after a moment, her eyes drifting closed and then fluttering open in a repeat pattern. "I am bleeding and unable to fight. You should ask if you shall be alright, foolish boy." I want to laugh. She makes it seem so simple, but then, she's used to these types of things. I lift her shoulders, helping her move to lean against a light post.

"You wish to save them, yes?" The question is rather sudden and a bit out of context. I look at her, seeking comprehension. Now, sitting on the ground with crimson seeping its way along the folds of her kimono from the large splotch at her stomach like a macabre flower, she seems so much smaller and meeker. She holds out one small, delicate (I say that based on looks; girl packs a mean right hook) hand, white energy swirling like snow around it.

"I-uh...yeah," I respond, still a bit mesmerized by the dancing snowflakes on her palm. It's kind of freaking me out. I don't actually know what I'm agreeing to, but she's so intense I can't help but respond favorably. The fairy girl raises her head slowly, her large, purple eyes staring right through me. It's creepy as hell and more intense than the place itself.

"What of your death? Should you die here and now in this attempt, will their deaths be alright with you?" I get what she's saying. Basically, I die or I die, classic lose-lose situation. However, the only thing that sinks into my head is the word attempt.

"So...basically, you have no idea what the hell you're doing?" She doesn't respond, which I take to mean a reluctant yes. I glance around, time slowing into a muted stream of noise that resounds in my head. Only her low, alto voice rings through clear.

There's my family, bloody and half-dead over there. On the other side of me is that Monster (now I understand the capitalizing) rising from its daze and preparing to attack again.

"This is not a taught technique," the girl gasps, "but I will try. The Monster is after you, I believe. I know you have the capability." The Monster growls. I take her hand then, all hesitation stripped from me. The white energy snakes around our joints fingers, wrapping up my wrist. It feels...electric.

"Come here," Rukia demands. I can't argue, not with her power surging around my body. I lean in close to her, carefully, and next thing I know she's got her lips pressed against mine. It's not really a kiss, per say, because we don't move our mouths (me because I'm in shock and her because I'm pretty sure she's not trying to actually make out with me), but the intensity is all there. To me, it seems like being bathed in moonlight while sitting in the snow storm of the century, ice decorating everything in intricate little patterns. I can't think, I can't breathe.

_I am Rukia Kuckiki, as I have said,_ I hear in my head. I know it's her talking to me over whatever the hell kind of bond we have going on at the moment, _Now tell me your name. How do they call you?"_

I respond shakily, unsure if she will hear me, _Ichigo Kurosaki. _Then my name echoes in my own ears and the white explodes outwards. I'm being torn to pieces, cold and hot all at the same time.

Then is stops.

I open my eyes to find myself standing a male version of the clothing she had worn. The edges are decorated with red, unlike her former clothing. It looks more ragged on me, and frankly, I look pretty cool.

I point my hand at the Monster, preparing to tell it to die, when a black wave shoots from my outstretched limb, forming a sword as tall as me.

"Now, you bitch," I tell the thing, "Die!" I have never wielded a sword before in my life, but as I attack the Monster with it, I feel an instinct teach me how to use the weapon, as if I was born to do this. I know it sounds crazy...but that's the only way I can think to describe it.

Then it's over. The Monster disintegrates, its blood dripping from my blade. I smirk triumphantly, turning around.

"Hey, Rukia-!" I stop mid sentence, unable to speak as I take in the scene.

Rukia lays naked, her powers stripped from her. She gorgeous like this too, and I am not ashamed to admit I wonder what fucking her would be like, how that skin would feel under me. Damn, that doesn't help the situation any.

"R-Rukia!" I run back to her, a bit of panic in my voice. I don't know how whatever the fuck happened just happened, but I owe this girl. Collapsing next to her, I notice something about her that the floating robes and ice had kind of distracted me from.

She has wings.

They're pale, gossamer numbers that extend from her shoulder blades. I reach behind myself to feel for wings on my own shoulders, but only come across the robes her power had dressed me in. Or maybe they're hiding underneath all that fabric. Shit, I do not want some gay-ass wings!

"Ichigo," Rukia coughs out. I'm distracted from my thoughts, reaching for her almost like a knee-jerk reaction. I hope it's only her power coursing through my body and not something more complicated. Her body is healed as far as I can see. Not that I'm looking too closely or anything; I mean, she's naked and all...

"Humans like to...wish on falling stars, no?" She murmurs, gazing up at the moon. I don't respond, she's not listening to anythng but her own thoughts. "And crazy things happen. Like...winning the pottery, I think it is called?"

I laugh. It's a strangled, relieved, and exhausted sort of sound, but I do it anyway. "Lottery." She's a dumbass and a naive fool. Why'd I have to get stuck with this one?

"Yes, as you say," she amends. "That's what this is. I am a falling star...and this is your wish, so something crazy is going to happen." She says it with such certainty that I am unable to argue. I get a sense of foreboding in my neck, the prickle telling me the something crazy is to be bad. Like, fuck me sideways bad, and I have no way out of it.

_That's what happens when stars fall. _And now she's definitely jinxed it and I'm screwed. Plus, I never got around to eating dinner.

Well, _fuck._


End file.
